This episode is the proceeding of, after dealing with an abusive ex. This will leads to meeting my current loving and caring husband. Life really is an adventurous journey and I have a great one now. My past was a dark one but yet, I’ve surpassed it all.
I was overwhelmed with the suggestions and feedback that I have received after my story ended. At the very last chapter of “I Survived” (Chapter 18), there were 441 visitors in just one day reading the last chapter. They were so anxious how my story ended. A lot of them requested that I should be blogging about what happened then and how I met my prince charming. You guys persuaded me to blog about Healing My Wounded Existence After an Enormous Life Event. You spoke and I listened.
In Chapter 18 at the very last paragraph of my story, I was riding a Greyhound bus away from my abuser. During the long boring 4 days ride to get to my destination, I wasn’t sure what to think of my self at the time. I was asking my self then, “Now what? Should I be so ashamed now that I’m a divorcee? Should I keep this to myself? Should I even bother telling my family back in the Philippines? Should I really care?” You know what? It was even stupid to be thinking that way and NO, I really didn’t care to be a single woman again then. I fought my own battle and have won my freedom! what negative people say and said about me, I don't care! What matter then and now is who I am. Nobody is perfect! We all have flaws.
In the Philippines, if family and friends heard that you have been divorced, to them it is such a disgrace towards your family. No matter what the situation, you have to stand by your man. As many say “In Sickness and in Health, Till Death Do Us Part.” They quickly assumed that you are not a good wife if your marriage failed. That you did not fulfill your duty being a wife. That you are not submissive enough. That you are not doing it right and that you have to be this and that! Blah blah blah! I am just sick of this belief. And No! In the situation where you have been verbally, mentally and physically abused, would you still stand by your abuser? NO! of course not! I will reiterate why I was not ashamed then of being a divorced woman. Matter of fact, It felt great to be a real woman again and not some sort of a victim. I’m glad there is such a divorce here in US.
It wasn’t easy to start my life all over again but I would choose it over living in a miserable life with an abusive partner. Life sucks but you have to be tough! Luckily in my case, my dearest cousin was there for me. She helped me recovered my wounded existence. She was there for me during my hardship until I was on my own.
After receiving my documents from Jack Ash, I did not waste any more time. I applied at one of the local prestigious toxicology company in California and I got hired. Finally, after two months I was on my own feet. I moved out from my cousin and this time I really did enjoy being a single woman. I started going out to a club with newly Californian friends every week, sometimes twice a week and I had discovered that I was such a gregarious person. I met friends of different backgrounds and of different race.
Truly, I started seeing my self visibly to the world. I had hid too long in the dark corners. I knew my existence still wounded and only time can heal. I know then that the storm in my life has just passed, I did not want it to haunt me forever. Yes, it was still fresh in my heart and in my mind but I was ready to move on. Yes I was aching but I knew that I was going to get through this. Life must move on!
Read My Next Thought ==> While Going Though the Healing Process of Recovery!
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If your interested reading a novel or in the mood for it click my => TRUE TO LIFE STORY
After the Storm= Healing My Wounded Existence
My Three Years Anniversary!
Healing My Wounded Existence After an Enormous Life Event!
Taking My Life Back
Re-entering Into a Dating World
Wow Ate, another continuation and suspense again? I really believe in miracles. If your heart is pure and clean, no matter how many obstacles come in your way, God will assist you. Never mind what people can say. I experienced hearing negative comments from other people too. Maybe they are right. sometimes They are just too "busy bodies"..
ReplyDeleteAs this moment, as I read your write-up again, I believe you're in the right track. God bless
I am so grateful that I am alive and enjoy my life free of mental pain from my abuser. Whatever happened yesterday, it made me emotionally stronger today and that whatever comes my way or in the future I can be sure that I can cope it easily. ;-)
ReplyDeletehello I was reading your story while I was crying just had fight with my abusive husband..and hear everything bad stuff about me according t him..I am a filina married to american...I can relate to you..Though I'm not physically abused by my american husband but he is killing me inside..just like you..been called all names,I'm very proud of you..I just keep everything to my self..I think sometimes Im crazy..I was a happy girl before but not now.. I'm living my life in misery..I hope you could help me too..
ReplyDeleteHello Anonymous Filipina Wife: I do hope that you can work it out before things could get worse. Please do not wait. If you think your American husband does not love you any more, just ask him nicely not to treat you badly and that if he is not happy with you to let you go. I know it can be difficult for you but a life with free mental and emotional pain is greater feelings than losing him. Contact me anytime if you need support. I might be able to help you out as I have been that road before.
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